doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
i now understand why vodka
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
