You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I am naked and annoyed.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
