You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
