Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
