We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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