Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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