plz talk dirty to me
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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