see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
