sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
