I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
