hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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