so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
