nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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