But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
