Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
