like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
