it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
