saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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