we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
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