the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
