I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
