Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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