your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
