I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize