So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
why do cheetos always look like penises
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
