He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
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