he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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