Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
