i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Randomize
