Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
i now understand why vodka
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
