yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
