thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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