How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
