it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
