Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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