HIV tests are more positive than that guy
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
