How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
