this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
third nipple confirmed
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
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