I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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