why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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