Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
