I think I died a long time ago.
i think i have herpe
just one?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
