Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
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