come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
