I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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