So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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