You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm passing your future prison.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
