This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
