Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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