pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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