But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
